Progressive Beats of the Heart

In the air, in between Milano and Scandinavia – like always.

I am listening to Hatikwa – progressive trance – and I love it.
Even though this year, with tickets bought for Indian Spirit, I didn’t make it to any festival.
The logistics of reaching Germany in the middle of my internship were too optimistic. But I’m still glad I paid – to support the organization of one of the best festivals in Northern Europe.

So now, with Hatikwa – flying, literally – I picture myself covered in dust, barefoot, dancing at a psytrance festival.
Next summer, I’m hitting them all. Let me see if I got this right, because I think two overlap – maybe Boom and Ozora.

I’ll start with Burning Mountain – then Boom, then a small one called Summer Dream – then the one and only Ozora – followed by a Transylvania trip – and finally closing at home with Indian Spirit.

As if life hasn’t gifted me enough, as if I haven’t spoiled myself enough with travels, I also made sacrifices no one sees. I like to talk about them – not to victimize myself, but to show the real side of things, the part most people never look past the surface to notice.

I share these things for real talk. For vulnerability. For telling it as it is.

So, as a thank you to myself – me, who has supported, nurtured, carried me through this beautiful Master’s journey – I am giving myself two wild months of only festivals. No rent, no home, just dance, freedom, and music.

Yesterday I watched The Imitation Game. A strong story. I cried in deep reflection after.
It began with: Are you paying attention?
And I was. Because how could I not be?

Alan Turing – a genius who cracked the code and saved millions of lives. A man whose work shaped the future. Yet his ending was suicide, forced into chemical castration just for being gay. Humanity was saved by his mind, and humanity destroyed him for who he loved. That contradiction has been haunting me since.

I started writing this piece to share how I’ve been feeling lately – not to brag about festivals.
But I’ll blame it on Hatikwa, for making me impatient, dancing with one leg in the air, following the rhythm, in the clouds.

Lately, I’ve had this strange feeling I don’t know how to name.
So I thought – maybe up here, among clouds, there’s enough acceptance for me to speak freely. Maybe the words will flow.

Maybe here, where I belong to the sky, I can break free and understand myself.

Are you listening?

Do you know that feeling – when you’re little, or even when you’re grown – when you admire someone so much, you wish to become like them?

I feel like I arrived there. Like the traits I once admired in others, I carry now.
I feel like we are all beautiful. That life is miraculous. That humanity, love, kindness – they are spectacular.
The sunset, the moon, the sheer existence of feelings – all of it is breathtaking.

It all makes sense now.
I am who I wanted to be, and more.

When I step outside myself and look in, I cry. Because I see her. That girl. That woman.

And I see too that we are all struggling. But even in this age of individuality, we are the same.
We want the same. We love the same. We breathe the same. We struggle the same.

Every glimpse of humanity’s beauty lights me up inside.
Maybe it comes with age – that wiser is kinder, and kinder is more beautiful.

I always read. I always admired strong women. I always admired beauty.
And now, I feel complete. Like I became a good version of myself. I made the right choices. I am where I should be. I am happy. Simply.

I read about women who travel, work, write, love. In whatever order, with intensity.
And here I am – traveling, evolving, working, free. Freedom born of ambition and resilience.

I write. Blogs, books, words about love, journeys, and taboos like sexuality.

I live in more than one country at once.
I build futures in different places.
I thrive on the road.

I love. I am loved.
By family, by friends, by partners.

I am lucky. I am giving back. I am good. I am kind.

I push limits. I fail. I rise again.
I am confident. I am smart.

I am enough.

So may you swim until you reach where you need to be.
Never lose trust in yourself – and if you do, let yourself be the one who believes the most. The rest will follow.

Never settle for less. Give all you have, expect nothing back.
We don’t do it for the prize. We do it for the journey.

When you give, the universe carries you.
And you’ll meet people, connections, experiences that transform you.

Life is gorgeous.
Fight for what you believe in.

And here it came – the understanding of why I feel this way.

I wanted to keep writing advice for “how to be”… then I looked out the window.
In half an hour, I’ll land in Copenhagen. The sky is burning in sunset.

It calms me.

I was about to write: let loose a bit. Don’t try to control everything.
And that was it.

The thing I couldn’t grasp: I let go.
I finally understood we can’t control. So instead, I enjoy the ride.

That’s the freeing feeling I was chasing without knowing its name.

I let go.
And it feels incredible.

Try it.
Stop trying to control. Be aware, but present.

Dance with the chaos.

The beauty of life is in its imperfection.