Early Morning of March

I have no idea what I’m doing, but let’s begin anyway.

Clearly, I have no idea what I’m doing.
I’ve never done this kind of thing long enough to actually become good at it.

I used to keep a blog back at the end of high school, in the early days of university. Somehow, I gathered a few hundred readers per month. That didn’t necessarily mean I was good—just that I was maybe a bit popular among peers in my city. That time felt small and big all at once.

I also left to study abroad, which felt like a bold move back then. Now, a decade later, studying abroad has become the norm. It’s no longer something that makes people raise their eyebrows. It doesn’t impress anyone anymore.

And still—here I am. Starting something again. Not knowing what I’m doing.
Which might be… a good thing?

Maybe that’s exactly how it should be.
Maybe the best advice is: learn while doing.

Now, before going further, I need to decide how open I want to be. With you.
Because this blog isn’t just a blog.
It means more than one thing to me.

First of all, it’s a place to express myself—something I’ve longed for. Something that felt so vital, it eventually got suppressed. For years, I’ve dreamed of sharing my thoughts with people. Holding space for my own voice. Writing a blog, a kind of public diary.

The second reason is deeply personal, too. I want to remember. I want to create a space where I can trace my memories—see myself across time. There’s something so strange and beautiful about reading your own words after just a week, or a year. Watching how your thoughts evolve, realizing things about yourself you didn’t know. I love rereading what I wrote—sometimes I’m impressed, sometimes embarrassed. But I’m always discovering something.

The key, I think, will be consistency. Just keep doing it. Only stop if I stop loving it.
And right now? I really, really love it.

Oh, right—what I was saying.
There’s a third reason I’m doing this:
To open minds. To shift perspectives.
To talk about complex, maybe even controversial, subjects from a personal point of view. To offer something honest that might help someone see the bigger picture.

I don’t claim to be formally educated in psychology or anthropology or any of that—but I do know myself. I’ve spent over a decade reading and studying human behavior on my own. I’ve developed what I believe is a strong emotional intelligence, and an even stronger curiosity.

In fact, I’m planning to pursue a PhD in therapy. I’ve found the program. I’d need to complete some missing academic credits to get in, but it’s the first time I’ve ever felt genuinely excited about a PhD—because normally, I don't enjoy research work. But if this gets me certified to help others? Then so be it. That’s what I want.

My dream is to work either in couples therapy—focusing on communication and connection—or individual therapy centered around self-esteem, self-discovery, and self-acceptance.

It’s kind of funny, though. You don’t need to have mastered these things to help others with them.
Like self-esteem—it’s something I still struggle with deeply.
Valuing myself, feeling proud of who I am—those are ongoing battles.
I’m often incredibly self-critical, always pushing myself harder.
And while that drive has brought results, it’s also left scars.

So yes, back to the point.

I’m still not sure how much I want to open up about certain sensitive topics.
Not just yet. Maybe we need to build something first—trust, a rhythm—before diving into the really raw stuff.

Don’t get me wrong, I’ll touch on deep things right from the start.
But the depth of what I share will grow over time.

Let’s build this together, slowly. With care. With curiosity.
Let’s see where it goes.